10-Kendra Buchholz-Miscarriage-Vaginal Twin Birth-Mora & Wren

May 3, 2023Posted inHospital Birth, Twin Birth
10-Kendra Buchholz-Miscarriage-Vaginal Twin Birth-Mora & Wren

Description:

In this episode, we dive deep into the details of Kendra’s personal experience of miscarriage, getting a double rainbow baby surprise, and how she advocated really hard for herself during her pregnancy and had a strong support team on her side, which led to an amazing vaginal twin birth experience in the hospital operating room.   

Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational purposes only with no intention of giving or replacing any medical advice. I, Kiona Nessenbaum, am not a licensed medical professional. All advice that is given on the podcast is from the personal experience of the storytellers. All medical or health-related questions should be directed to your licensed provider. 

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Transcription of Episode 4:

Hello and welcome to Birth As We Know It. I am your podcast host, Kiona Nessenbaum. I have experienced birth as a doula, a student midwife, and as a mother of three amazing children with my husband and high school sweetheart by my side. After attending over 130 births, including my own, I’ve realized that each birth experience is truly unique. So make sure you subscribe and join me every week as we are guided through many different birth experiences through the lens of the storyteller. Please be aware that some of the stories can be triggering to hear, so feel free to pause, take a breath, and come back and listen whenever you’re ready. With that said, let’s prep ourselves to dive deep and get detailed about what really happens in the birth space. 

As a reminder, this podcast is intended for educational purposes only and has no intention of giving or replacing any medical advice. All advice that is given on the podcast is from the personal experiences of the storytellers. All medical or health-related questions should be directed to your licensed provider. 

Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the Birth As We Know It Podcast. Today, I am super excited to be interviewing my personal chiropractor and now friend. Her name is Kendra Buchholz. Yeah, Kendra Buchholz? 

KENDRA: Yes. You got it. 

KIONA: Okay. And she is the owner of Interurban Chiropractic, and she’s been in practice for quite some time. She sees everybody universally of all ages, but she has developed a focus over the years on serving people throughout their pregnancy, immediate postpartum, as well as seeing children. So it’s really, really great. She’s amazing. Adjustments are fantastic. So, Kendra, welcome to the podcast. 

KENDRA: Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. I’m happy to be here. 

KIONA: Yeah, of course. Let’s start off by you telling us a little bit about yourself. So who’s in your family and yeah. 

KENDRA: So I have been married for eight and a half years to my wonderful husband and best friend Joey. He’s amazing. Nothing in my life would be possible right now without him, so we’re kind of each other’s rock. We have two-and-a-half-year-old boy-girl twins named Mora and Wren who were born on our anniversary. So our little family shares one big day every year, which is really fun. And as you mentioned, yes, I’m a chiropractor. I have been in practice for coming up on 13 years already. 

KIONA: That  is amazing. I love that they were actually born on your anniversary. I think that’s so fun. 

KENDRA: I know, it’s so fun. I’ve had a lot of people be like, oh, did you have, like, a scheduled C section? And you picked that day? And I’m like, no, the universe said that was the day. And it’s actually really fun now that we could just have one big celebration. We try to plan a trip or do something fun every year to kind of celebrate the big day for all of us. 

KIONA: Yeah, I think that’s super awesome. That’s so awesome. 

KENDRA: Thanks

KIONA: So prior to getting into your personal pregnancy experience, had you ever seen or attended a birth before your own? 

KENDRA: I have not. I have loved the birth world for so long. I’ve said this many times, if I was not a chiropractor, I would absolutely be a midwife. I do, I just adore the entire world. I think it’s such a beautiful process to be part of in all aspects. And I’ve always wanted to be part. I would love to have been part of a birth. It just had never really… the only opportunity ever had, one of my very good friends, Anna, was giving birth, a home birth at home, and asked me to be there if I could. But she lives in Rochester, Minnesota, and we live in Seattle and it just didn’t work. That was before we had kids too. But getting the last-minute ticket and timing yourself to be there for the unknown birth. So I was very honored to be asked to that and I would have loved to be part of that, but I have not ever been part of a birth. I would still hope that could happen for me at some point. So, yeah, I’m sure it’s a very sacred space to be in. 

KIONA: Yes, very much. I think that’s awesome. That’s really cool. So when it comes to pregnancy, your pregnancy, were you planning or trying to become pregnant? 

KENDRA: Yes. So I can’t really get too much into the twin pregnancy without kind of touching on some background stories. So, yeah, Joey and I celebrated our five-year anniversary. We actually rented a van, like an 80s Volkswagen van from this really cool company in Seattle called Peace Vans, and we road-tripped on the whole Oregon coast. We had the best trip ever, and we were, like, on the Oregon coast, which has kind of always been somewhat symbolic for us. I’m not sure how this has happened, and I’ll bring this up later in the podcast, but somehow with the Oregon coast is always tied into major life moments for us. And we love to travel and all these things. We’ve always been putting off having kids because I’m like, but I want to go on more trips and I want to do more things. And we were kind of at the end of this on the coast, on the beach, and it was just one of those moments and was like, I feel like I think I’m ready. We should…Let’s have a family. 

And so we kind of had this huge moment, and we decided to start trying. And, I mean, it happened immediately, which was I guess I was kind of thinking it would maybe that’s why I wanted to wait so long. So we got pregnant, like, right away, and I was so excited. And we ended up actually having a trip back to the Midwest. We’re both from Wisconsin, and most of our families are still there, so we had to trip back to see my family. And I was only four weeks, and my family, we’re all really close. It’s impossible to keep any news from them, so we told them right away that weekend, and everyone was so excited, and everything was going great. And then I woke up on the day I turned seven weeks to a bunch of cramping and some bleeding. And I did a lot of research thinking, like, okay, maybe this is just like, some implantation bleeding or there can be other reasons. And it seemed just not right, though. So I had…I don’t remember if I’d even had my first appointment. I think I might have had my first appointment with Puget Song Birth Center, which is who I was planning on going through. I’ve been known all the midwives there for years, just working with them through referrals with patients, and so I’ve been really close with them. And I’ve always said, whenever I have a baby someday, I want to go through the birth center and have a home birth. 

Anyway, I called to let them know what was going on and talked with Jen Lindstead, who was there at the time. And also Jen will come up multiple times throughout this podcast as well. She’s been a very important figure, I guess, in my entire journey. But she answered the phone, I explained what was happening, and she was like, yeah, that doesn’t sound great. Let’s see what’s going on. So of course I decided to go to work because that’s how I am. And I worked through my first shift, and by lunchtime, I could barely stand up. And so we went in. They got us in for an ultrasound at the first place we could get in. 

And I knew what was happening before we even did the ultrasound. And they confirmed that there was no heartbeat and that we were having a miscarriage. And so it was a pretty tough experience for me. Also, I had a lot of guilt because I’d been told many times this couldn’t have anything to do with it. But the weekend before that, we were actually working on our house, and I fell off of a ladder while I was like, staining and landed pretty hard. Kind of had some cramping after that, but nothing ever ended up coming of that. A week later, this whole miscarriage happened. So I was in the bathroom at the time, and Joey must have talked to the doctor, and he came back and said, I just want you to know that that ladder fall had nothing to do with this. And I still don’t know if it did or it didn’t, but I had a lot of guilt feelings. I feel like I caused it, and I’m not sure that I did, but anyway, it was a pretty horrible moment knowing that it was ended. And I think the biggest thing that shook me is it felt like it couldn’t have happened because everything seemed so perfect. We’re like, we’re going to have the baby, and we told everyone, and it happened right away, and it was just like, going according to plan. It was a really good example of how life doesn’t always work, how you think it’s going to. 

So, yeah, we ended up going through the miscarriage, had a lot of talks with the midwives. I mean, they’re so amazing. I went in for just an appointment, just to sit and cry with them. That was in October. That was mid-October. We both knew we wanted to continue to, you know, try again. So I think I think I got my period back pretty quickly. I think we tried in November and it wasn’t successful and I wasn’t that upset about it because I knew that that could take some time to kind of iron out with your hormones and stuff. And so in November we tried again and I think it was then, like over Christmas time, we came back from Wisconsin. We were back for the holidays and shortly after that into January, I was expecting my period. And I remember it was a Tuesday and it was starting and I was just really disappointed again because I was like, it happened so quickly the first time and now I just felt like it wasn’t. And I remember it was a Tuesday because my sister-in-law Izzy, my brother lives in California, he’s like my best friend and his wife Izzy, they were also trying to get pregnant for the first time. They’re very close to us, they’re like our best friends. And so we were talking quite a bit and they were having a little bit of trouble also getting pregnant. And so I remember calling her to tell her, I’m getting my period, I guess it’s not going to happen this month. 

And then it was just kind of a slow start to the cycle. So the week went on, I went to work, everything and Joey and I had actually planned a little getaway, I think it was for MLK weekend in January, down to the Oregon coast again. We rented a little place in Manzanita and we were coming through Astoria and I think I had brought some wine. And then all of a sudden it just kind of dawned on me. I was like, wait. I thought I was getting my period, and it never ended up happening, but sometimes it can take a few days to actually start. So I think I hadn’t really thought about it, but for some reason, I was like, I feel like we should stop and get a pregnancy test. So we stopped at the Walgreens in Astoria or Warrenton, Oregon. I picked up a pregnancy test, and then we drove to our airbnb, and I was like, well, I don’t want to take this tonight because I don’t want to have any emotion either way. I just want to get a good night’s sleep and we can look at it. 

And in the morning but my entire excitement level was just much different than it was the first time. And so, I mean, I just went in the bathroom and took it myself instead of us staring at the stick together and counting down the seconds because I was sure it was going to be negative. And it was, like, super obvious, like, two lines. And I was like, oh, my gosh. I was actually very shocked. I was not expecting it to be positive. So we were in Oregon again when we found out we were pregnant. 

And we were both excited but very guarded. I definitely did not let my excitement permeate my whole soul too much. I kept it shelled, kind of, but the first symptom I had was severe si pain. Like my right leg, I could barely lift it. It was just super bad. And I know as a chiropractor that oftentimes the first trimester people will have really bad sciatica or really bad low back stuff and you’re not even showing yet, but just the flux of hormones hitting your body right away. So I was like, okay, well, obviously I’m having a symptom. I had no other symptoms the first time either. I’ve never had any morning sickness. I really had zero symptoms besides the si pain. And it would have only been about, like, four weeks at that point, too very early, I guess. Just the first missed period. So yeah, I guess back to kind of like your original question. We were definitely planning on getting pregnant but just I guess the second time it just felt different. Like not quite what I, what I was, what we envisioned. And I made an appointment pretty quickly with the midwives again and then again about like seven weeks or so in… And I did…We decided not to tell our families right away. I’ve never really understood the whole like, don’t tell anyone until after like twelve weeks kind of thing. Because if you do go through a loss and you haven’t told anyone, then you really have no one to share it with. So we weren’t necessarily not telling anyone because of that, but I just think I wasn’t ready to say it out loud to anyone else. I don’t know, like a weird jinxing thing or something. I just had of course a lot of anxieties surrounding that. 

KIONA: Right

KENDRA: And so right around seven weeks, again I started spotting and I was like happening again. But I didn’t reach out to the midwives because I was just going to let it kind of progress and see and I already knew what it was going to happen. If it were going to happen, then I would have reached out to them to confirm. But it wasn’t really progressing more than just like light spotting. So I was just like, I’m just going to keep an eye on this. And that weekend we had booked this really cool cabin up in Salt Spring Island, which is super cool. It’s like the extension of the Washington San Juan Islands, but it’s on the Canadian side and it’s really beautiful. I highly recommend it if you’ve never been up there, but I was like, I don’t know if we should go up there because what if I’m having a miscarriage? But I kind of was just like, well, I mean, if I’m having a miscarriage, I guess I’m just going to work through it and I guess I’d rather just continue on with their life. I don’t know. It was weird. I think I just wasn’t like I really wasn’t connecting with my… I don’t know, I think I was shelled. I was very like, so let’s just go do this. Anyway. 

So we went up there, but the whole time I was just like, slightly spotting. And in hindsight, we probably shouldn’t have gone because if I were actually having a miscarriage, it wouldn’t have been a good place to be in a different country. But we did go anyway, and by the time we were coming back on the ferry, it felt like I was getting a little bit more spotting, but still not much of the cramping. And I don’t know, I wasn’t sure what was going on. So I ended up finally making an appointment and talking with I want to think it was Tracy Cooper at the time. And she encouraged me to go get an ultrasound because we had a big trip planned to Kauai in Hawaii. And we were planning to do to meet my brother Cole and sister-in-law Izzy to do this huge hike on the Nepali coast called the Kalalau Trail. It’s like a nine-mile, I think, hike into this remote beach. And obviously, Tracy is like, I mean if you’re going to have a miscarriage, you don’t want to be having it in Hawaii. Let’s just confirm one way or the other. So we agreed to do that and they got us in, I think it was a Friday to the same place, actually, the same place that we went for the miscarriage, which kind of they really just got you in wherever they could get you in for an ultrasound. 

KIONA: Right

KENDRA: It just happened to be that place twice. The first time, I will say that doctor was just so wonderful. I can’t remember his name. It was a male doctor. He was just wonderful. So I was fine going back there again, just a medical place that does ultrasounds, whatever. So anyway, we went there, but on the whole way, as we were driving there, I was just shelled and buried, guarded, and I was sure I was having another miscarriage. We were talking the whole way and I was like, well, we’re having a miscarriage. It’s okay. I already had a plan of like, I’m going to reach out to a naturopath and get a hormone panel and figure out what’s going on, why my body can’t sustain this. And I was very certain, and we were ready for this news. 

So we got there and the ultrasound tech came in and put the little gel on my stomach, put the little wand on there, and right away I was like, holy shit, there is two babies. Very, very obvious. I don’t know if there’s a way to share a picture or something, 

KIONA: yeah, yeah for sure! 

KENDRA: But I would love to send that picture because there’s no denying it. And immediately I was like and the tech went, oh. And my husband was like, what’s going on? 

KIONA: What, I can’t see it! 

KENDAR: And I was like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. And she’s like, oh, there’s two babies. And I just put both of my hands on the top of my head, and I was just like, absolutely speechless. I don’t know if I’ve ever been actually speechless in my life. People say that, but I really was. I think the first thing I said to her, I was like, Are they okay? There are two heartbeats. And she’s like, There are two strong heartbeats. And I was like, no effing way. I was shocked. And I was like, but what about all the bleeding? And she’s like, It’s implantation bleeding. You are growing two placentas right now, so your body is just, like, ridding all of any kind of old blood that was up there from before, just cleaning out your entire system to form these two placentas. So my implantation bleeding lasted, like, twice as long, which is what you would have with a single pregnancy, which is, I think, why I just never thought of that as an option or like a reasoning, I guess, behind it. 

So she said, I’m going to step out and just give you guys a second. So she stepped out and. I remember the first thing I said, my strongest gut instinct, and I said, it’s a boy and a girl. I knew it. I just said it’s a boy and a girl. And I was 100% sure. And we never did find out the sexes, we left it as a surprise. And I’m not one of those people that has super strong intuitions like that. But I was even down to baby A as a boy and baby B as a girl. I just was so sure of it. So that was the first thing that came out of my mouth and then the second thing that came out of my mouth. And I haven’t had that many of these moments, but it felt… so my dad was a twin as well, so there was always kind of this running joke on and off that we might have twins someday because my Dad is a twin. And even my husband had said it in the past and I was like, don’t say that. I definitely would never wish for two babies at the same time in just talking about it. And so it was kind of like a possibility, but honestly, I never really contemplated it. So the first thing I said, the second thing I said after I said it was a boy and a girl is I said, well, this is a gift from my dad. Because my dad passed away in 2015. We were very close and in that moment, it is hard to describe, but I felt him there. I felt this spiritual presence of like, the only other time I felt that was when he passed, as he passed in his room, I felt like that what they talk about, that something else is in the room kind of feeling. And in just that moment, I felt that same thing. And I said, this is gift from my dad. And all at once I really felt like that moment healed me from the miscarriage. I mean, of course I still think about it, but I felt like. I felt like it was almost like a makeup for it. 

KIONA: Yeah.

KENDRA: The baby I lost now was giving me giving back to me and I was getting two at the same time. And so I felt really strongly that was a gift for my dad and it was just such this beautiful moment. Also, I was like freaking out, but it was also like this beautiful moment of like, okay, 3s even though this is crazy, of course this was meant to be. It was like, I was like, I’m surprised. I never… like it just felt like this was supposed to happen all along and it just made sense. But I’m like, I’m surprised I never saw this coming. But that’s not how life works. But yeah, it just felt like it was meant to be. All in that moment. 

So, ee had this amazing moment and then the doctor came in and this was a doctor I had not seen before as a woman. And I’m still kind of upset about this because she basically just ruined my entire experience. That moment was just like taken away from me because, from us, I should say. She came in and she was pretty cold. Not very this wasn’t a big deal, she sees it everyday kind of thing. Of course, it is for us. And she was like, okay, here we’re having twins. And I was like, I mean, still wrapping my head around this. I only found out like 2 minutes ago. And she’s like, well, with twins we will schedule you for a C-section. And she immediately just assumed I was going to do all my care there. She was my doctor now. And so she was like, so as your doctor, we’re going to schedule for you for a C-section. And we’ll likely do that around 35 weeks. 

And she started giving me instructions about having to need to take baby aspirin every day for the whole pregnancy and all of these things she threw at me. And I almost started hyperventilating because I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on a second. I never even said I was going to go here for my care. And secondly, it was a very quick realization from what I had planned, which was a single birth in a water tub overlooking the Puget Sound at our house in this peaceful, beautiful home birth. That’s what I thought it was going to look like to being told I was going to have a C-section at 35 weeks. 

KIONA: Yeah. Complete opposite of your expectation. 

KENDRA: Complete opposite, yeah. And I was just like heartbroken because she definitely steamrolled me and didn’t even barely let me talk and basically told me that’s what was going to happen. And then they immediately shuffled us down the hallway and put me in this room for a nutritionist to come talk to me about how to start eating for twins. I remember just being really annoyed because she’s like, I mean, go through McDonald’s. Get yourself an Egg McMuffin. And I was like, well, I’m definitely not going to put that shit in my system during this pregnancy. But I can’t even listen to this right now. I can’t have nutrition advice right now. I don’t even like.

KIONA: How are you supposed to process yeah, how are you supposed to process everything? Like, you just found out you were having twins, and you were, like, all high in this moment. And when you were talking about that, I was literally, like, having tingles and goosebumps over here. And I’m just like, oh, my God. 

KENDRA: I know. It really was it was such a beautiful moment. And then just to be turned like that. I’m still, like in hindsight, I think once I’ve processed all that, I was like, is just, yeah, it was just too bad. 

KIONA: It’s really messed up

KENDRA: But anyway, on my way home that night, on our way home, we were, like, driving, and I was just, like, in shock. Of course, I was processing, though. We’re having two babies. But my mind immediately then was caught up in this whole, like, I got to figure out, I got to figure out how to do this. I’m not going to have a C-section. But I wasn’t sure. Honestly, I never looked into it before. Is it possible to have a vaginal birth, or do you have to have a C-section? I didn’t know anything, right? 

So I did what only I knew to do, which was to call Puget Sound Birth Center and be like and this was, I think, a Friday night. It was after hours at this point, and Jen answered again, and I was like, oh, thank God, because she talked me through the miscarriage on the phone and checked in with me afterward. So it just was fitting that she answered the phone. And I was probably talking a million miles a minute, being like, Jen, oh, my God, blah, blah, blah, we’re having twins. And they say I have to have a C-section. And she did inform me that, unfortunately, I was not going to be a candidate for a birth working with Puget Sound Birth Center because they don’t do twin births just because they’re considered to be more high-risk. And so I was kind of heartbroken and crushed because this entire time, for years, I had just planned to work with this group of women that’s amazing and I already know, and now I’m having to find a doctor at a hospital. 

But, yeah, Jen kind of helped me that day. She said, you should look into Ali Lewis. She is a medical doctor and OB up. She works at UW Northwest, and she is the head of the midwifery program at UW. So I had her name, but I was told, though, it is an option to do a home birth for twins. If you want to do that, there are a few people that will do that. So that was kind of on my radar for a little while. And I did have a really good heart-to-heart with Val, who was the owner of Puget Sound Birth Center at the time, just like, the most lovely woman I’ve ever met and very full of wisdom. And she was like, sweetheart, I really don’t think it’s a good idea to have a home birth with twins. And coming from the owner of a birth center who has been at many, many births, I was like, okay. I took that word to Gold, I was like, I trust you 100%. 

Basically, the reasoning being just, well, I should back up. I had what was called die-die twins, which means dichorionic diamniotic. That means that they were separate. The funny way, someone told me, is it’s like they’re basically like roommates, but they have their own houses and their own refrigerators, meaning that they had their own Amniotic stacks. They were not together, and they had their own placentas, so they weren’t going to steal each other’s nutrients, they weren’t going to tangle their cords. They’re the most low-risk twins you can have. They’re basically two babies at the same time, just separately inside. And so it was a possibility, but it was a possibility for home birth. But she just said it’s just not a good idea due to the fact that the hemorrhage risk with twins and delivering two placentas, which typically fuse into one placenta, which did in my case. I had one, like a gigantic placenta that was like, I don’t remember, 2ft across. Wow. With two cords coming out of it, it eventually fused into one. So she did say that the hemorrhage risk for twins is so high that it would be not unlikely you’d have a hospital transfer just due to blood loss, and I didn’t want that scenario. I didn’t want to have a perfectly beautiful home birth and then have to go rush to the hospital for blood loss. 

And so I decided, with Val’s wisdom, to just look into finding a medical doctor that I could proceed with. And I had Ali’s name, and I had another name that was recommended to me, a guy in Tacoma. But you know, it’s not easy to find, even in Seattle, even having all of these amazing resources, it was not easy to find an obstetrician who was friendly to the idea of trying to have a natural birth. I really just… I felt because so much was taken away from me as far as options, I just felt like I lost a lot of control. Like, I wanted a home birth with no medication. I wanted to have a completely natural birth, and now I was going to have a hospital birth, and I didn’t realize when I signed up for that, that the Washington state law requires you to birth in the operating room if you’re having twins sorry, I should say that if you’re having twins. So I was just like that took me till the very end of my pregnancy. It was my biggest mental block to wrap my head around the fact that I was going to be wheeled into the or. For the pushing stage of birth, and I just could not get over that. 

There were so many things that it felt like were out of my control. So potentially being able to not have an epidural and to have a vaginal birth was just something I wanted to hold on to. If it was a possibility that and not finding out the sex, not finding out the sexes of the babies, I never wanted to know before anyway. And I felt like those were a few things I still had in my control, especially with the birth if it progressed the way I was hoping it would, so I was really adamant about that. I remember even asking on the Seattle mom’s Facebook group or something about, does anyone know any providers that might be open to, I think I said, like, unmedicated natural twin birth. And I did have some support. I had a lot of people named Ali Lewis and then her partner, Anna Pengetti I think her name is up there as well were also named as resources. But I had a lot of people just be like, oh, honey, ha ha. Good luck with that. You’re never going to be able to it was really like…

KIONA: So rude!

KENDRA: I know. It’s so rude. Like, a lot of people will be like, yeah, you think you’re going to do that until you’re in the moment, and you’ll be, like, begging for the epidural. And I was really just disappointed also, kind of maybe more, I guess. Ah, yeah. I just wanted to do it even more. 

KIONA: To prove people wrong. Like, this is possible. 

KENDRA: To prove people wrong. Yes, I know. And so I was kind of in this journey of looking for a doctor, and I reached out to Jen again, and I said, hey, do you happen to know any doulas who maybe have experience with twin births? Because I knew having a doula would be very important to me, not only just to help me, but to advocate for me through this process if I was going to be in a hospital. And Jen said, well, how about I just be your doula? 

KIONA: Jen is so awesome. I  just have to say, you’ve mentioned her name a couple of times, and I love Jen. I love Jen. 

KENDRA: I know. And I was like, Are you serious? I mean, you’re a midwife, you’re very, very busy, and you were going to want to be my doula. And I remember just being like, it’s okay, you don’t have to. She’s like, I would love to. It would be an honor to be at your twin birth. And I was like, well, it would be an honor to have my doula be an experienced midwife. 

KIONA: Right. 

KENDRA: And I felt very confident that I was going to have her by my side to help me kind of navigate through the hospital setting and just to help Joey. He, of course, like, he’s extremely supportive to me, but he doesn’t know that world either. And 2 was very fearful of having… I was very fearful of having just a lot of the hospital, the classic hospital experience where you’re kind of like scared and bullied into certain things that you don’t necessarily want or, I don’t know, maybe told things that aren’t necessarily… just like a lot of the scare tactics. 

Also another side note, backstory. When I was eleven, I had a major, very large ovarian cyst that actually torqued and cut off the blood supply to my ovary and I ended up having, like I almost died. I got went in for an emergency appendectomy like four days after they’d misdiagnosed it as a gastrointestinal virus, and I ended up having an emergency surgery to remove my left ovary, which was apparently almost gone septic through my body at that point. 

KIONA: Wow.

KENDRA: So I only have one ovary. I’ve only had one ovary since I’ve been eleven, which makes having natural twins even cooler, I think. 

KIONA: Yeah. 

KENDRA: And then my dad passed in the hospital. Hospitals are just not like happy places for me. A lot of anxiety and things. And so, I kind of had to wrap my head around being in the hospital and operating room, but I just wanted to have my team around me. So I met with Ali. I had another appointment scheduled with a different doctor to meet with after her, but she was just so wonderful right off the bat that I felt very comfortable and very confident. And I think she kind of like… I’m not quite sure if she knew anything about me or just read all of my intake stuff, but she knew what I was looking for when she walked in. 

I was very careful as a provider myself not to be like, okay, you don’t like those patients who come in and tell you what, how to do your job. But I also want to tell her to know what I really wanted to happen and that I was confident in my body, but not step on her toes and make her feel like I was threatening her position as the provider. That’s a delicate balance, I think, to have,

KIONA: Very much yeah.

KENDAR: Especially in childbirth, like trusting the person who’s going to catch your baby, but letting them know that you want. To advocate and have control of the situation without insulting them, I guess. And she was very wonderful and not, I think, navigating that with me and letting me to feel like I needed to tell her all the things I wanted to happen, but also knowing that I wasn’t stepping on her toes at all. So, yeah, she right away, I think, knew basically what I was looking for and was able to kind of help me through that first appointment with just being like, this is a possibility, this isn’t. I could really see the struggle that she had to be in as a hospital employee, though, being like, she is all about natural childbirth, but also she has to navigate the hospital setting and the rules and the regulations. And so she definitely I think she even twice maybe throw it when asked specific things for me, like, is it really necessary that she births in the OR? She was kind enough to ask whoever the higher-ups are at the hospital. And she came back and she said, yeah, they said it’s hospital policy. And I was like, okay, well, thanks for asking. 

KIONA: Right. She took that extra step. 

KENDRA: Yeah, she really did. And so she was just wonderful throughout. I think the only thing that made me a little uncomfortable was that she is part of a practice with multiple doctors, and it was not guaranteed that she would actually be there at the birth, although she did say she was so wonderful to even do this. I think she’s gotten quite a following now, and she’s a mother herself with her own life. So to say that she will come in, potentially try her best to come in, even if she’s not on call that day, gave me a lot of peace of mind, but it still wasn’t guaranteed that she would be there her, but I guess I just kind of had to trust that hopefully, she would be, and. Yeah. So I felt the pregnancy went pretty smoothly because I was able to be at peace with my doctor and my doula. 

KIONA: So, with your strong support team of Ali Lewis and Jen Linstad, did you end up doing anything more specific toward preparing for labor with twins? 

KENDRA: Yeah, I did a lot of reading. A lot of reading. So, like, fast forward, I guess I should say rewind back to when I was talking about going to Hawaii. So we found out we were pregnant with twins the week before we left for Hawaii. So I ordered this book called Super Cheesy. This lady does this thing called Twinaversity, and it’s called What to Do When You’re Expecting Two. And I read that thing cover to cover on the way on the flights, and I was, like, jotting down notes furiously, and I was like, oh, my God. I was just so overwhelmed by what do you need two of? What don’t you need two of? Don’t forget about this. 

So when we got to Hawaii, we had a couple of days on our own, which I think was really great to process that whole thing. And then my brother and sister-in-law flew in, and we were going to tell them about being pregnant. And so we had lunch, we got to this, they flew, we picked them up, we went to this little place on the beach, and we were, like, ordering drinks, and I was, like, studying the menu on the non-alcoholic section, like, really strong. And I ordered whatever, like some kind of pina colada, virgin pina colada. But it had a name. It was like, I don’t know. The beach bum. And so I was like, I’ll have a beach bum. And my brother looked at me because they were also scanning the non-alcoholic section. And I was like. He’s like, Are you pregnant? And then I was like, yeah. And Izzy’s like, I’ll have a beach bum too. I’m making this drink up. I remember what it was called, but I was like, Are you pregnant? She’s like, yes. And so we had each planned on surprising each other with our pregnancy announcement and ended up picking this exact moment to do it. We were both, like, telling each other. So I was nine weeks pregnant, and she was five weeks pregnant. 

KIONA: Oh, that’s so cool. 

KENDAR: It was so cool because we got to share that moment together. I forgot to put that little part in there. That’s why I went off course. But I thought that was fun to share because we got to tell each other at the same time that we were pregnant and then do this big hike together. But yeah, I did a lot of reading. I did a lot of research. I did not find a lot online or in books for supporting a holistic, I guess holistic pregnancy, which kind of is what you’re going to lead up to your natural birth. I mean, the medical version of everything was just really what was the mainstream. And I did find one really thin, maybe 80 or 90-page book called The Holistic Twins Pregnancy. And it was just one woman who was able to have a pregnancy to term. I think she was, like, 39 weeks and had a twin birth at a birth center. And I read that thing cover to cover a few times because it was like the only shred of anything I could find that was like, okay, so someone else did this. I can do this. 

But it was really hard. I really did not find many resources. A few things online here and there, but really not much. Most of it was either C-sections or just horror stories about how things didn’t go quite as planned. So I just tried to find any shred of research I could to kind of support me. And I really just like…yeah, I really just listened to my gut and I was like, I feel like I mean, really, if you break it down to it, the Di-di twins, it’s like a regular birth. It’s just like you do it twice. 

KIONA: Right. 

KENDRA: It shouldn’t be any more complicated than that. And Ali said as long as they term on Baby A and Baby B. So Baby A was considered the baby A is always which one is head is lower in the uterus and which is likely going to come out first. So baby A, she said as long as Baby A is head down, we can do a vaginal delivery. If Baby B is breech, that’s fine because a lot of times they’ll turn head down once Baby A is out. But if Baby A is breech, it is an automatic C-section. And so 1s that was also, like, the wild card. Of course, anyone who’s even pregnant with a single baby has to worry about, are they going to be head down. I guess the only other thing I really did besides just kind of reading was I did do a Hypnobirthing class through Nancy Allen at East Side Hypnobirthing. She was wonderful. Joey and I did that together. And this was like the height of COVID We found out we were pregnant in February of 2020, so before COVID existed. But the pregnancy, the entire pregnancy was through the height of COVID And it was giving birth in a hospital during the height of COVID was like, back and forth until the very end on whether they were even going to let Jen come.

KIONA: Mmmm. I was going to ask that. 

KENDRA: So restrictive. Yeah, they were so restrictive about whether they would be allowed. So, like, most of the pregnancy, I had this perfect midwife doula to accompany me. And up until June, they were born in September. Up until June, they weren’t even allowing doulas in the operating room, which I know a lot of policies make sense, but that one just didn’t make sense to me. It doesn’t make sense to restrict. Even all of the OB’s would agree that doulas are helpful in the labor process. It just didn’t make sense to me. And in June or July, when things kind of calmed with COVID slightly because of summer, they did lift the restriction and I was able to have Jen there for the birth. But then in October they stopped it again and so I hit the window perfectly where they allowed her there, but I had to prepare for the potential that she wouldn’t be and I was very confident in my body, but I’ve never done this before. I never had given birth to a baby before and I didn’t know what giving birth to two would be like, so I wanted to have some tool. 

So I did the hypnobirthing. Nancy just did multiple Zoom sessions and gave us Joey and I a lot of homework together on things like how he could support me. We did a lot of practice with ice. Like I would hold ice. I think there was in the back of your ankle. It was like a really sensitive place where you have like a minute and a half, where you’re going to… going through a contraction and you just need to be uncomfortable for that minute and a half and. Don’t think about the ice, to think about something else. And then at the end of the minute and a half, so Joey would like to set a time where we were practicing, me being uncomfortable for a minute and a half with this cold ice and not thinking about it. And then different ways that he could help me with breathing and where he could put his hands to help support. 

I think it was really good for both of us because it really gained. I feel like it gave us both a lot of confidence. He felt like he would be better equipped to support me during the process. And I felt like I just had some places in my mind it could go to kind of get through. So that’s really all I did. I didn’t really do any childbirth classes or anything. I mean, they really weren’t much offered during COVID like, the really scary part of early COVID, so there wasn’t a lot offered. So I did a lot of chiropractic care. I think I got adjusted weekly the entire pregnancy. Massages probably twice a month, I got acupuncture. I would highly recommend all of those. Even in my practice, it is really evident that if you do a lot of bodywork through the pregnancy, that the births are just smoother because your body is just ready. Everything’s aligned. The nerves can work like they should. Everything just works better. So at the 20-week ultrasound, baby A was head down and baby B was breach. And they made this beautiful ying-yang shape 1s on the ultrasound. They snapped a photo of it. We have it framed in their room 

KIONA: Aww that’s beautiful. 

KENDRA: Because they’re making the most perfect ying yang. And I was only 20 weeks, so I wasn’t worried about the fact that baby b wouldn’t flip. But I think I also didn’t want a lot of ultrasounds. I didn’t want to have, like, an over, but that was where Ali and I had to work together. She knew I didn’t really want a lot of ultrasounds, but I also know for twins, that in order for her to operate and trust my body through this whole process, I had to give her some of the medical knowledge she needed to be safe. So we did a 28-week ultrasound, and baby B was head down. So from somewhere between 20 and 28 weeks, she flipped, and they both stayed head down the entire time. 

KIONA: Nice. 

KENDRA: Till then to the end, which I think really helped me be comfortable. I see a lot of women, when the babies are breached, they’re just so much more uncomfortable because it’s not how they’re supposed to be laying. And it’s so much harder for your body to hold a breech baby than when the baby’s head down. And so having them both head down, I mean, I was still pretty big, but it wasn’t, like, super obvious that you’d be like, oh, she’s definitely having twins. I just looked, like, uber pregnant, but I didn’t look, like, as big as I thought I was going to be. And I really think that’s just because they were, like, pretty aerodynamically streamlined in there the way they were supposed to be. 

KIONA: They were sharing space fairly. 

KENDRA: Yeah, they were. But I would say, yeah, the reading and then the hypnobirthing and just my own body care is what I did the most of a lot of just resting and stretching and drinking. A lot of spinach shakes and trying to eat… Trying to figure out how to get, like, over 100 grams of protein a day, which is what they require for twins, was, like, my biggest struggle, because I like meat. But you can only eat so much meat and so many nuts. So I did a lot of dairy, full-fat dairy. I ate so much cereal. I just had some massive cereal craving. So I just ate cereal with whole milk the whole time just to get, like, fat and protein and in addition to all the other stuff. But yeah.

KIONAL Man. Yeah. I can’t even imagine trying to get 100 grams of protein in every day.

KENDAR: It was a lot. I had, like, an app, and I was like, my God, this is so hard. 

KIONA: And then you’re like, this is only 19 grams of protein. Oh, my God. 

KENDRA: I know, right? Yeah. I also ate a lot of perfect bars, which are, like, these peanut butter protein bars, but one of my biggest pregnancy symptoms. I never had morning sickness the whole time. I felt amazing. Actually wasn’t even that tired. I felt good. I just had severe heartburn, like, the worst. And those peanut butter protein bars, I don’t know what it was about the peanut butter, but it would instantly kick in my heartburn. It was just maybe too thick, I’m not sure. But, like, the apple cider vinegar, I would put apple cider vinegar in, like, a little bit of water and take a shot of it before bed. And if I didn’t do that, I would wake up with flaring heartburn. So I think I drank, like, two and a half bottles of apple cider vinegar during my pregnancy. So I keep the heartburn happening.

KIONA: That’s a lot of apple cider vinegar. 

KENDAR: It was a lot. And then, like, the minute they were born, I never had it again. But that was, like, my biggest symptom, as well as, like I had a lot of hand numbness after 30 weeks, which I was not anticipating because I really thought being well-adjusted would help my hands be less numb. But I think it was all due on to the amount of pressure and swelling I had going on. 

KIONA: Yeah. And that heartburn is just from your stomach, literally having no space to even fill. 

KENDAR: No space 

KIONA: That esophagus was just open. 

KENDRA: Exactly. 

KIONA: So let’s go ahead and start moving toward the story of your actual labor. Did you go into labor naturally, or did you have to be induced? 

KENDRA: Yeah, I went into labor naturally. Still, I kind of had to advocate for that. They consider twins to be full term at 37 weeks, and I really wanted to make it to I really, really wanted to make it to 37 weeks. I was so worried about the premie, the NICU time, the whole potential that could happen. So I actually wanted 38 weeks. I was just, I’m going to put a number in my head, and that’s what I’m going to get. And that was just kind of like a universal, I’m putting this out to the universe. They’re going to be in there till they’re 38 weeks. I figured the longer, the better, but I know that beyond that, it can be tough. Full term is considered 37 weeks. So it was already great that I made it there. My 38 week appointment, I went in, and my blood pressure was a teensy bit high, like. 132 over 85. It wasn’t even high at that high, but they wanted to do a non-stress test, and so they sent me over. 

By the time I did that, my blood pressure was back to normal. I mean, it was like, end of August, and I had to haul all the way in from the parking garage and then up these stairs and then sit down on the table and get my blood pressure taken. I was, like, 38 weeks with twins, so I felt like it was understandable that it was a few points high. But they freaked out and wanted to start doing all these tests, and it was slightly high. And so by the time they did the test again, it came back to normal. They did blood work. The blood work was taking a really long time to come back for some reason. And so the doctor came in. I’d never met this doctor. She was just a different one on call. And she was like, well, your blood pressure is good, but I think we should induce you. Let’s have a baby today. Babies today. 

KIONA: What!

KENDRA: And I was like, wait, what? She’s like, I mean, you’re 38 weeks, so you’re beyond term, and there’s really no medical reason for you to continue the pregnancy at this point. 

KIONA: Whaaat…

KENDRA: And I was like, whoa, well, I feel like my body’s not ready yet because I’m not in labor yet. And she’s like, well, yeah, but it only at this point is more risk if you continue to stay pregnant. And so I was just like, I don’t like that. You’re not even my doctor. And if it was really a big deal, they would have made me stay. But she’s like, well, you can go if you want, but this is what I’m recommending. So we were, like, almost home already. So we had we live in Burian, and we had to drive up to UW Northwest, so, like, North Seattle. So we were, like, almost back to Burian, and the same doctor called me, and she’s like, okay, your blood work came back. You need to turn around and come back. Your platelets are slightly low. We need to induce you. And I was like, okay, well, what does that mean? And she’s like, well, it basically means that you can’t get an epidural if your plate platelet dropped too low because of the bleeding risk. And I was like, well, I don’t want an epidural anyway. 

And it was just kind of this really not great conversation. I ended up saying I did not want to get induced. I called Jen when I got home, and I was like, am I being dumb? Should I get induced? I just want to make sure I’m not being not safe. And she’s like, no, think I think you’re doing everything right. Allie called me and agreed that I could stay pregnant as long as I promised to come in every day for non-stress tests to check my blood pressure and check my plumb levels. I was like, okay, fair. Yes, I can do that. So I went up there every day, and it was so stressful because I would get in there, same thing, waddle all the way down the hallway, lay on this table, and then they’d be like, okay, let’s take your blood pressure. I’m like, just give me five minutes. I need to calm down. Ali was on call, and she came in. My blood pressure was also fine. Platelets were actually up a little bit, so she was happy with the numbers. 

And she said, well, let’s do a check. I hadn’t been checked at all to see where I was at. She did a check, and she was like, wow, you are almost 5 CM dilated already. 

KIONA: Wow.

KENDRA: And I was like, what? I had no idea. I was like, what? And she’s like, yeah, I’m not doing any more poking around up there. Because she’s like, I’m about to break your water if I do anymore. She’s like, that baby’s head is right there. And I was like, okay. So I think with that, she was like, I’m confident letting you continue to just do this on your own because I think it’s going to happen soon. But if you’re still pregnant on Monday, which was, ironically, labor day, I’m on call on Monday. She said, so let’s break your water. Because she’s like, it’s not really like inducing you. It’s just kind of getting the show on the road. And I was like, okay. I feel okay with that because it’s like a natural way of getting things rolling, and you’re going to be guaranteed to be there. So we went home, and we just kind of tried to go through our regular weekend. I was really just still kind of not happy about having I had, like, an appointment at 07:00 a.m. Or something at the hospital on Monday. 

And I was like, I just thought this would happen on its own, not like a scheduled thing. So I tried everything to get myself to go into labor. Like, everything I could think of, I tried to get it for acupuncture. At that point, though, my back was really hurting, and I was the first time I finally let myself say that I was kind of over being pregnant. I really didn’t want to say that. I wanted to be very like, I wanted to enjoy every second of my pregnancy, and I really did. I really felt pretty good, and I enjoyed every minute. But at 38 weeks three days, att that point, I was like, okay, I’m done. My back hurts. Plus, I just wanted this to happen on its own because I didn’t want to be induced. And that was Saturday and went to bed Saturday night, nothing. 

Sunday morning, I got up at, like, 415 to go to the bathroom. And I was walking to the bathroom and I just started what I thought was peeing because I had literally no bladder control at that point. There’s so much baby and placenta and amniotic fluid. So I’m, like, running to the bathroom. I was like, oh, my God, I’m peeing. And I ran to the bathroom and I was, like, sitting on the toilet peeing. And then was just, like, sitting there and was like, still peeing. And I was like, in a minute. And I was still peeing. And I was like, oh, my God, I’m not peeing anymore, but there’s still liquid coming out. And I was like and it took me, like, a second. I was like, wow, okay, this is happening. My water broke. And I just had a moment there with myself. But I was like, no one knows this yet. I’m going to have this 1 minute of sitting here and kind of like, prep, okay? I was like, okay, this is happening. 

So I actually put, like, a little pad on to catch it. I went back into bed, and it was our anniversary, and I woke Joey up and I said Happy anniversary. My water just broke. And he was like, what? And so I expected to have some time at home. I was thinking, like, first baby, I want to labor at home for a while. But that was not the case. I was getting hard contractions already. And I was like, well, I’m going to quickly jump in the shower. I don’t know. I’ve heard you say that in your previous podcast. I don’t know why we all think we need to take a shower or something right when things get going. But I jumped in the shower and I was, like, doubling over in the shower. I was like, okay, this is actually so I called Jen and I was like, we’re going to go to the hospital. This happening fast. 

I decided to quick eatable materials before I left because I was like, I need to have something in my system. And I was like, on this cereal kick. And the last minute, I just grabbed this empty compost bag just in case because I was starting to feel a little nauseous. And so we started driving to the hospital. I called this is so weird to me. I called them. I called, like, UW Northwest, like women’s health center. And I said, hi, my water broke. I’m on my way in. And the lady was like, well, there’s no doctor here, so.

KIONA: What! 

KENDRA: I was like and I looked at my phone. I was like, did I just call the childbirth center at the hospital? And she’s like, yeah. She’s like, there’s no doctor here. We’ll have to call someone to come in. I was like, Are you kidding me? I mean, it’s a Sunday. But seriously, aren’t you guys, like, open staff 24/7? So that was kind of concerning. She’s like, well, we’ll call somebody. And anyway, I was, like, texting people, my water broke, and we were on our way. And then by the time we got on to 99 and we’re heading north, I was like my eyes were closed. I was like, fully. This was not able to be ignored anymore. It was really intense. We were pulling into the hospital where you have to put the ticket in for the gate to open, and I just started puking. So luckily I had that bag because we just bought a new vehicle, like two months before that. And so that compost bag saved her car and Joey pulled up, and I was like, there’s no way I could even walk. So they wheeled me down the hallway, and I was just, like, vomiting because it was just, like, really intense contractions right away. 

So they got me into a room, and a lady took she could not get my IV in. It was probably almost one of the worst experiences of the birth, was just like, getting that IV in my hand was so painful. And it was one of those things I’m like, do I even need an IV? Like, really? But of course, we’re like, well, if we need to put a medication. And so it’s like, whatever. I’m not going to fight you. But I was trying to balance on the ball all these things. I thought I was going to want to be on the ball, to be in the birth tub. I was so uncomfortable on the ball. The tub. I wanted nothing to do with the tub. I mean, it’s just like a hard it’s not like it’s a big hard bathtub. And I was like, there’s no way I’m getting in that right now. 

All I wanted to do was just lay in the fetal position on my side in bed. Because if you have really bad cramps, you just kind of want to curl up into a ball. So they let me do that for the most part, but eventually, they had to kind of make me move to continue the progression. Although everything was progressing pretty quickly. But they came in with this doctor came in. I’ve never met her before. I don’t even know who it was, to be honest. And she was clearly scared. She’s one of the staff, but she did not have, I don’t think, a lot of twin experience. And she was very nervous. You could palpably feel how nervous she was. And she was very skittish and medicalized about everything. And right away one of my wishes was to not have an internal fetal monitor where basically, it’s quite barbaric. They go up in there and screw in a monitor into the baby’s skull to monitor them. And she wanted to do that. And I was like, I don’t want that done. I don’t think it’s necessary. There’s no reason. 

And so we were fighting about that, and I just did not feel comfortable with her at all. And someone said, well, we called Ali. And then I don’t know how I heard this, but I heard someone else say, she’s on Whidbey Island right now. And I was like ugh, because Whidbey island getting with the ferry. That could be hours, like 3 hours possibly. And I was like, I’m not going to make it. I’m not going to be able to hold this back. So I was like just laying through these contractions. All of my hypnobirthing stuff slightly went out the window. Really all I wanted to do was just be in my own, like my eyes closed during the contractions and holding Joey’s hand. I had to have his hand hand. And I just wanted to go into my own space. I was not a loud birther. I don’t even think I made a noise. 

I wasn’t sure what I was going to do but I just was on my side squeezing his hand and just breathing. And I don’t know where I went. I just went into this place. It was very dark, kind of by myself. It was actually kind of scary. I felt like I was like alone in the woods a little bit with no one to help me. And then I would come out of each one, each one of those contractions and be like, okay, I’m back. But it was weird. I went into some dark alone place. Joey does reflect on that being actually really scary for him because he was trying to offer me like Gatorade or water or something like that and he’s like, which one do you want? And I would tell him like, oh, I want the water or I want the juice mix thing. And at one point he asked me and I didn’t respond and he said Jen was like, Joey, she’s not capable of making that decision anymore. And he was like oh my God. Because as partners you’re always together through emotional events. 

And I was just like unresponsive to him during contractions. Like I was not there. And I think he felt a little bit scared and alone even though he had Jen there, which he trusted. But I really did kind of just go through that in my own space and I don’t even know time… my water broke at 415. I think we got to the hospital by 730. I don’t even know what time this was, but all of a sudden I heard Ali’s voice, and I opened my eyes, and I was like, oh, she’s here. And of course, being a nice Midwest girl, I was like, the first thing I said is, I’m so sorry for making you come all this way. Apologizing to her. 

KIONA: Yeah. 

KENDRA: She’s like, no, it’s okay. I was like, I ruined your vacation. And she’s like, no. No. She’s like, let’s get you checked. And she’s like, you are 10 CM. Let’s do this. And I was like, oh, my God. And so I got this huge breath of fresh air under my wings. That okay. I can do this. My doctor’s here. And so they wheeled me to the operating room, which was my big hang-up. But Jen came through again for me, and she rephrased it in my mind to say she’s like, I promise you, Kendra, when you’re in that moment and you’re about to push out those big, beautiful babies, you’re not going to care where you are. I promise you’re going to be so focused on the moment. And I was like, thank you for saying that, because that really calmed me down. And in hindsight, the operating room was wonderful because they turned all the lights off for me, and there was no windows. And I really liked that because I kind of think going back to primal birth of animals and the cave you want to be, I think the birthing mother often craves like a dark, quiet space away from everybody. That room I was in was full of windows, which was nice, but it was so bright. 

And when they wheeled me to the or. And they turned all the lights off, it was like I was in this really dark, peaceful place. And then I had Joey put a whole twin playlist together for me. And it was all meditation music, and they had the meditation music playing and it was dark and there was like eight women. There was another midwife that was there. And then that doctor who wanted to induce me was also there, and my doctor and Jen and this huge nurse staff. It was like this really amazing group of powerful women all around me. And then the male anesthesiologist, who definitely felt super uncomfortable. I think he might have gotten scolded because he was trying to put a bunch of monitors on me. And I think someone was like, what are you doing? Get off of her. She’s fine, we got it. She doesn’t even need anesthesia. And so he had to stay, though, in case. So he just stood against the back wall with his arms folded. This whole group of women is around me. 

And same thing when you’ve interviewed. I’ve listened to all your other interviews, and people always seem to have a strong recollection of how long they pushed for. I have no idea. I don’t know. It was like time didn’t exist for me. I was very tired. Like I’d almost fall asleep between contractions, which I heard someone else say, and that seems like it’d be unreal, but I would be really in it and I’d just be really exhausted. And I think I just was kind of in my own space. And anyway, pushing went really well for baby A very productive. It was. Yeah, a lot of, like those sensations were just so interesting. You’ve never had them before. You can feel that contraction coming. I felt it was kind of like before you throw up when you feel that wave rising in your body that you don’t necessarily want to happen, but you can’t control what’s about to happen. I didn’t love the pushing phase. I felt it was productive, but it was also so really painful. And I thought the pushing was really just like the pressure was so much, so I could feel that rise of that I had to push coming, and then I’d be like, okay. And it was productive, though. 

And at one point or another, I swear he was already crowning. Like, it felt so much pressure, so much that ring of fire. And someone was like, do you want to feel your baby’s head? And I was like, yeah, okay. Or, no, they said, do you want to see it? That’s what they said, do you want to see it? So I was imagining him fully crowning. And so I pushed on and they put a mirror down there and they’re like, okay, push. And like, the tiniest sliver of skull showed, and I was like, Are you kidding me? I thought I was almost there. So at that point, I was like, no, I don’t want to know anymore. I don’t want to know how far I have to go. Because I think I thought I was almost done and I wasn’t. 

So, yeah, I kept pushing, though, and I felt like I felt very productive. I felt him crowning, and then I felt his head come out, which was like the craziest sensation, and I felt his shoulder slide out, and I was just like, wow. And the first thing I heard Jen say was, Kendra, he’s big. And I knew it was going to be a boy. Anyway, I did, and they pulled him up onto my chest right away, but his cord was very short. I remember Ally saying, his cord is very short. They couldn’t even get him up to my belly button. It was actually really interesting. Probably I’m imagining how that placenta fused and maybe just how it was still pulled on the other side. 

So they had to cut his cord rather quickly. Joey cut it. I was hoping to have a little more delayed cord clamping, but Allie was really worried about what Baby B was going to do because it’s very common for Baby B to turn breach after Baby A is delivered. So she just wanted to get him out and on me so she could start manipulating my belly to try to keep baby A from turning breach. So it was a boy, and we named him Wren. And they put Wren on me right away, and he started nursing right away. And it was just like this everything stopped, this beautiful, calm moment. My contractions were done. It was like we had the baby, it was so beautiful. Everyone was like, oh, my God. I don’t know. I think Ali let us bask in that moment for, like, five or ten minutes, and then she’s like, so you ready to do this again? 

And Jen always talks about the whole room palpably, being like, oh, my God, she has to do that again. And I forgot about it for a second that I had a second baby in there. And I was like, no. But then I was like, nope, I’m not going to do that. I wouldn’t let my mind go to negative. So I was like, no. Yes, I’m ready. Let’s do it. And so she’s like, well, I can break your water if you want, because my water did not break with her, which is so crazy. Or we can wait, but it might be a while. So I was like, no, let’s just do this. So she broke my water. That was crazy. The gush of fluid ever on the table, which feels much different than it, like slowly trickling out, like the first one. And instantly all those contractions came back and I was like, oh, my God. I was just right back in it again. Like full-force labor again. And not like back-to-back. A lot of eople think that twins are often born like two minutes part, which they are if they’re in the same amniotic sac. But I just had a full mother labor to do, like, from scratch. I mean, I was already dilated at least, but I had to fully do it again.

And pushing was not productive with her. It just didn’t feel the same. They got me on my knees and I didn’t like that. I thought I was going to like that, but it did not feel comfortable. I did not feel like I was making any progress. It felt really hard. It just felt harder, like it wasn’t doing anything. With each push with Wren, I felt like I could feel him coming down. And for her, it just felt like nothing was happening. And so Allie checked me and she’s like, well, she flipped posterior. So essentially she was, like, sunnyside up or staring up at the ceiling, not face down. And so this is where Ali’s true expertise comes in and where I think I would have gotten in a much different situation if the other doctor had stayed. She said, we can continue on this way, but she’s like, it’s going to probably be hours of hard labor to get her out. She said, or if you’re comfortable with it, I feel comfortable reaching in and flipping her over. And I was flipping the baby. We didn’t know it was a girl at the time, but flipping the baby. 

KIONA: Right.

KENDRA:  And I was like, I mean, you can do that. And she’s like, yeah. And Jen said she had never seen that done before. So Allie reached in and somehow grabbed her and flopped her over. She liked a full belly flop inside me. It was the craziest sensation. And she flipped her all the way over. And then all of a sudden, I could feel the productive pushes. 

KIONA: Oh my gosh! 

KENDRA: And that moment shows how amazing that doctor is, because, really, I don’t think any even Jen said midwives wouldn’t typically do that because technically, and that’s why Allie asked me. That was an intervention, technically. And I didn’t want any interventions, but I was like, yes, let’s do that. And so, yeah, she flipped her and the whole table turned. Like, she started coming down right away and I was like, but this is an hour and 14 minutes later, almost. So Wren was, like, nursing on me. So the lactation consultant was, like, holding him and he was, like, breastfeeding while I was pushing out more. They thought that might also help with the contractions and getting more productive. So Jen actually was filming, which we found out later that she wasn’t supposed to do. So I’m really happy we didn’t know that because it’s very special to me that I have both births completely filmed. Again, like a hospital policy, but I’m so thankful. And there’s a really amazing picture of me fully pushing with all of my facial expressions, Mora’s crowning, and I’m like, breastfeeding Wren in the picture. 

I don’t even know I’m breastfeeding him. He’s nursing, but someone’s holding him on me. But it’s such a raw and amazing and beautiful picture. And so I got both births on film. Mora came out and I knew it was a girl before anything because I heard Ali say, Mom was right. That’s funny how you’re so in tune to those little voices around you. I remember people’s voices, specifically, and so I knew it was a girl before Joey even saw because I heard Allie say that and they put her on me. Her cord was not short, so she was able to be a little bit longer before they cut the cord. Joey cut the cord for her, too, and it was just amazing. And they were both on my chest and both, like, huge. Wren was 6lbs 4oz and Mora was 6lbs 15oz, which is, like, really big for two babies. And I only weigh 135lbs and I’m like, five, six, so I’m not that big. So, yeah, they were both like she was an ounce under 7lbs and he was almost six and a half.

KIONA: Oh my gosh. I have like, goosebumps all over. Oh, my gosh. I’m just like my hand is on my chest and I’m just like, oh my gosh. 

KENDRA: And then someone said to the whole group of women, did you know it was their anniversary today? And everyone’s like, oh my god. Everyone was crying. 

KIONA: Tears.

KENDRA: Yeah, everyone was crying. We’re sitting here with these babies and this meditation music is still playing in the back on this beautiful music. I think a few of them said it was like the most beautiful birth they’d ever been at. I just felt so thankful. I was so thankful. And I remember crying and telling Allie. She was like, stitching me up. And I was like, Ali, thank you so much for allowing me to have the birth I always pictured. I just was so thankful to her to trust me and to guide me through that experience. Of course, every birth is different and I knew there was going to be wild cards, but I was so thankful that I was trusted to try to do it my way. And I was so thankful I had a provider to trust me, I guess, and help me through that process. Yeah. So we had a really nice moment. She came up and held my hand. I just thanked her for everything. And it was just like everything I ever hoped it would be in the hospital operating room. Even though never thought it was going to be that beautiful in the hospital, it really was because I had such a great group around me. I really advocated for that and I had to make it happen that way. There is a stroke of luck in it as well. But I think we worked really hard to get that group of people around me. 

But yeah, I did not tear with Ren at all. I did tear with Mora, I think a grade two. So they were stitching me up. They asked if I wanted… I don’t remember. I think they asked if I wanted any medication for that. And I think I said yes because I was like, I guess I don’t really need to feel them, like stitching, all that. And they were doing quite a bit. They did some numbing stuff. I actually think I tore decently. And then it seemed like there was actually for a while, I was like, Is everything okay? Because I guess I was bleeding a lot. Like, a lot. I think they had to use five different medications to get the blood to stop. That’s where Jen said I remember her saying something like, midwives have three of those medications, but not all five or something like that. And they had to pull out, like, the fifth one to get the blood to stop. I think I lost over a liter of blood. 

KIONA: Goodness.

KENDRA: So it was a lot of blood loss and it was a long time. It was like an hour plus after the birth where they were, like, stitching and trying to get the blood to stop. So that was a little scary. 

KIONA: Well, yeah, because if you think about it, you had two placentas that fused into one. 

KENDRA: Right.

KIONA: And so you said that your placenta was like,  maybe like two feet

KENDRA: Huge 

KIONA: And that’s the wound that’s in your uterus. 

KENDRA: Right. Yeah, I felt there was a little bit of concern in the room, but not that they couldn’t handle it. But it seemed like it was more than they thought, so that took a while. Then they did wheel me back across the hallway. Jen is so cool because she’s like, I like to do a placenta tour. I remember her calling it. And she wanted to show me my placenta and talk over it with me so I could see it. And I thought that was so cool because it’s just such an amazing organ that literally sustains you, grow,s and sustains your babies. And I don’t think anyone ever takes a second to look at it. So she showed me the entire thing and how healthy it still was, which is one thing a lot of people will say with twin births. Like the placenta, apparently, you can say it starts to disintegrate towards the end or something like that. I’m not exactly sure. But mine was super healthy. Two huge cords coming out of it. So she went over that with me. And that was really special, I think, to be able to see the other piece of the organ. I guess that made that all possible. 

KIONA: Yeah. That’s so awesome. 

KENDRA: Yeah, they were healthy. They were able to breastfeed right away. So, I mean, that was my other big thing besides the natural vaginal birth. I didn’t have any medication and any drugs the entire time. And I wanted to do that so that they could come out healthy and ready to nurse. And they were they both flattered away, and I was able to nurse them, help with lactation consultants. There was a really wonderful one woman there. I think her name was Kelsey that helped a lot, and she was really great. And just the whole staff there was really wonderful. I felt really blessed to have such a good, care team there. And, yeah, just kind of in shock. I think it took me until a couple of days later to realize how thankful I was for everything. I think in the moment, you’re just like, oh, my gosh, so much to process. But yeah, it was beautiful. We went home on the second day. We would have went home. They could have discharged us the next day, but I couldn’t walk to the bathroom without passing out because of all the blood loss, so I needed a little bit of extra time. Our house has so many stairs. We’re down three switchbacks and, like, two sets of stairs set down in the woods, and then we’re like, three split, like, three levels of house. So I just needed some time to be able to get back home and walk the stairs safely. 

KIONA: Yeah.

KENDRA: But we went home on the second I think we went home on Tuesday. They were born on Sunday. We went home on Tuesday morning. 

KIONA: So how was your general recovery?

KENDRA:  It was really pretty good. Yeah. We didn’t have anyone come. My mom and stepdad came when the babies were ten days old, so Joey and I had the first ten days, just us, which I think was good to figure it out. But, I mean, zero people over for ten days, figuring out how to take care of two infants. So it was scary and exciting and all those things, but everything my recovery was really good. I did have my placenta encapsulated by Michelle. I can’t remember her last name. 

KIONA: Oh, my gosh, you  probably got so many capsules. 

KENDRA: Yeah, like, there’s like two bottles, right?

KIONA: Yeah. 

KENDRA: And so I did do that. I mean, I would like to say that I think that probably helped to support me. I’ve read this book called The Fourth Trimester, and I got a lot of information on that on, like I made a bunch of stuff ahead of time, like teas and different bars of energy bars and protein bars and things with a lot of fat in it. So I did a lot of research on what I could do. I did some sits baths to kind of help heal. So I think it was pretty good, actually. I would say it went really well. 

KIONA:That’s beautiful. 

KENDRA: Yeah. 

KIONA: That is so awesome. Oh, my gosh, I’m so happy. I’m just really happy right now. 

KENDRA: Thank you, everything. 

KIONA: Yeah. Your story is so beautiful. And like you said, twin births in particular, they could take so many turns and could end up completely different. But I am so happy to hear that you advocated so strongly for yourself throughout your pregnancy, and you had people on your team that were supporting you as well. 

KENDRA: Yeah. And I think there’s any takeaway for anyone listening to this. That’s just why I really wanted to share this is I just want people to know that that’s a possibility. Even Ali said a lot of the staff that was there watching the birth were like, wow, this is possible. Even that doctor who wanted to induce me said she had learned a lot. So I think it was a really educational experience for everyone there. And I am fully aware that not every twin pregnancy is able to have a birth like mine. There’s complications. But I do think if you have a low-risk twin pregnancy and it’s something you want to do, I do really think it’s possible. And I’m just glad to be able to share that and empower anyone who wants to do something like that for themselves. 

KIONA: Oh, that’s so awesome. And so I guess that leads me to my three kind of final questions for the interview, is what would be the one piece of advice that you would give to pregnant families, especially pregnant with multiple babies? 

KENDRA: Yeah, I would just say trust your gut, trust your instinct. I mean, from the very beginning, I really listened to myself. And if something didn’t feel right or something did feel right, I pursued it. Or just I really tried to listen to myself. So listen to what you want. Listen to your gut. I would say do your research. Find a team that works for you. You’ve said that before, too. Surround yourself by the people that make you feel safe and that support you, and just know that your body can do it. I mean, as people always say, women have been doing this for many, many, many years, and twin births were like, no big deal until not that long ago, to be honest.

KIONA: Right. 

KENDRA: My dad was a twin, and my grandma’s sister is still alive. She’s like 95 or six. And I called her when I found out I was pregnant with twins. And I asked her if she remembered anything about my dad’s birth, and she said, no. But all I remember is your grandma went to the hospital to have one baby and came home with two. And nobody knew that she was even pregnant with twins. And it wasn’t even that big of a deal. It was just like, oh, there’s another baby in there. And so I just think that as many medical advances as we’ve had that are amazing and life-saving, I think sometimes it makes a really simple, beautiful process kind of scary. And I think advocating for yourself, trusting yourself, trusting your babies, and doing your research would be my biggest advice. 

KIONA: Yeah.

KENDRA: And taking care of yourself. I mean, getting adjusted, go find a good chiropractor, find a good massage therapist, find a good acupuncturist. Take care of your body pre and post, because postpartum is no joke either. And I always say that to my patients. I think postpartum is harder on your body than pregnancy. It’s just overnight. You’re not pregnant anymore. Your whole core collapses. You’re not sleeping. You’re constantly holding a baby. It is hard. And so take care and find the time for yourself. We are all about the newborn when they come, of course, but I think women often neglect their bodies afterwards because they’re so busy taking care of the baby. And just take care of yourself. Find some good body workers to help you, and it’ll help you be much, I guess just feel better, have more energy, have less pain, sleep better, all the things that make you a better mom.

KIONA: Right. Yeah, I would also attest to that because I saw you throughout my pregnancy and  immediately postpartum, and I still see you regularly,  and it really has made a big difference. And now I’m more aware of my body and being able to be like, oh, man, I do think I need to get an adjustment. And that’s something that I never really paid attention to before, because if I had a twinge or a sharp pain or achiness, I was like, my body, I’m just tired, but it’s more noticeable. 

KENDRA: Yeah, absolutely. And I’ve had so many people tell me it’s made their birth faster when they’ve had chiropractic care throughout their pregnancy. The births are much faster. And then just taking care of yourself postpartum, I mean, even like, your emotional states affected by how you’re feeling. So if you can get an adjustment, feel better, feel less pain, sleep better, your whole postpartum blues can be better. We see a lot of babies, too. Birth is tough on a baby, too, so just did a lot of adjustments on the twins when they were little, and that’s definitely something that I think is really a very important time to have babies check too. So yeah, that would be another big thing I would say is just take care of your body. 

KIONA: Yeah, I 100% agree with that. I even took Katana in to see you once and yeah, she did fine. 

KENDRA: Yeah. 

KIONA: So the next question is, I already have a small list of resources, like from listening to your story, but is there any one particular resource you would share outside of Interurban Chiropractic to the listeners? 

KENDRA: Gosh, I think all of the things, as I mentioned, but I would probably just have to plug Ali Lewis again. I mean, nothing would have been possible without her. And that’s just a big resource, I think, because she’s an obstetrician in the hospital world. And I know that there are amazing everyone who has been on your podcast so far is either a midwife or within that midwifery world. So I know there’s already like a plethora of wonderful resources there, but there aren’t that many medical doctors in the area that are, I guess, as well versed in a holistic and natural birth as her. So I would probably have to just plug her and thank her again for the experience. 

KIONA: Yeah, for sure. I would be happy to do that. I will plug her for sure, too. And then I know that this is going to be an interesting question to answer, but if you had to explain your experience, like both of your pregnancy experiences down to where you’re at now, in one word, what would that word be?

KENDRA: I would probably have to say transformative. I remember reading about how birth is, like, the sacred passageway that a woman goes through to become a mother, and I remember just thinking, like, yeah, that has never been said like that before. But it is the one experience that really, truly turns you into a different person within a day. I mean, slowly, you’re already transforming throughout the pregnancy. You’re already much wiser nine months in than you were when you first were pregnant. But in that moment of birth, which can be a matter of hours to days, you just come out of that a completely different person. You’re stronger, you’re more confident in your body. You’re wiser, you’re more emotional. You’ve transformed from a woman to a mother, and you can never go back, but you’re a better person for it and much more compassionate and connected to everyone around you, I think. 

KIONA: Yeah. Oh, my gosh, I love that. That’s a perfect word. I can relate to that as well, and I’m sure many of our listeners will, too, because it is a really transformative or transitional period in your life where you’re completely, like, you’re not a completely different person, but you also are. You know what I mean? 

KENDRA: Absolutely. 

KIONAL I love that.

KENDRA: Thank you so much. I’m so happy to have been able to share my story and to hopefully inspire others to go out and do the same. 

KIONA: Yeah. I am so honored. So, Kendra, thank you so much for coming on the podcast. You are our first twin birth experience, and I’m excited for listeners to hear this, and I’m excited that you were able to share your story and just to be able to project so much joy and all the joy you felt and everything, like, the struggles, the happiness, like, everything. And I was literally in tears over here  trying to stop my face from pouring down listening to your story because it is so amazing. 

KENDRA: Thank you. 

KIONA: I love it so much. 

KENDRA: I do, too. I’m really honored to be able to share it on your podcast and help you grow, but also just very thankful that you gave me a space to share that. 

KIONA: Yeah, of course. Absolutely. I was so excited when you were like, oh, I’d love to be on your podcast. I was like, as soon as I got in my car, I was like, Babe, she said she’ll be on it. Yeah, it was really cool. So thank you. Thank you so much. 

KENDRA: You are so welcome. Thank you. And I will see you soon. 

KIONA: Yeah, see you soon. 

KENDRA: Bye. 

KIONA: I just have to say, interviewing Kendra brought me so much joy because I felt the love and passion that she had for her birth experience throughout her story. And I think that her story of a vaginal twin birth is not a very common one, and I’m so happy and honored to be able to share it on this podcast post-recording with Kendra. We also talked about her special meaning and feelings around the number six because it was Kendra and her husband Joey’s 6th anniversary, and the babies were born on September 6, and both of them were 6 lbs or more. So it was really exciting for her to have that connection with the number six. 

Next week, tune in to hear three amazing birth experiences from a previous Doula client of mine. Her name is Lauren Lock and she talks about a hospital birth and two birth center births and how that was different for her. So tune in next week to hear more about that. 

Thank you so much for tuning into this episode today. Don’t hesitate to share this with your family and friends. If you liked this episode, feel free to leave a review so my podcast can pop up for others and they can see and listen to it as well. If you have a birth story or experience you would want to share on the Birth As We Know It podcast, head over to Kionanessenbaum.com and fill out the guest request form that is Kionanessenbaum.com. I look forward to connecting with you again soon. Bye for now. 

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Last updated on September 18, 2024